Three renegade cops. Childhood friends. Who occasionally cop off with each other. Embroiled in a drug war conspiracy. With John Saxon. In LA. In the early 90s. What’s not to love about No Escape, No Return, a straight to video Miami Vice knock-off, directed by the guy who gave us Dennis the Menace Strikes Again?
Maxwell Caulfield, Dustin Nguyen and Denise Loveday play the moody Narcos set up by the DEA when a typically early 90s nightclub drug bust turns into an over-the-top explosive massacre.
Internal Affairs agent Saxon smells a rat, but director Kaganis seems more interested in following his miserable triumvirate moping around the house all day whilst serving out their suspension from duty pending further investigation.
Ex-Marine Caulfield hoovers coke up his nose whilst sorting out his finances, Ex-Navy Seal Nguyen stares into space whilst his wife packs her bags and Ex-Something or other Loveday remembers it’s Thursday and goes to visit her catatonic mum in hospital.
Alarmingly similar to Maximum Force (so much so that I am already starting to merge the two films into one 3 hour long early 90s, LAPD, straight-to-video, drug fuelled reverie), No Escape, No Return appears to have No Point, No apparent Significance.
Worst of all, John Saxon sits agonisingly close to telephones in all of his scenes, but never actually picks one up…